But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls……
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.
Kahlil Gibran
Perhaps you’ve arrived here because your relationship has reached a place where it needs support.
Reaching this point in your relationship may bring anxiety, disappointment, or grief, and perhaps a sense that something has gone wrong. Many couples find it difficult to ask for support, and even harder to imagine that this point in your relationship might become the beginning of something new.
Periods of challenge are a natural part of relationships and can offer an opportunity for deeper understanding, growth and connection. They are an invitation to pause, to understand what is happening between you, and to discover what your relationship may be asking of you both.
For many couples, patterns of conflict, distance, or misunderstanding begin to take hold. Conversations that once flowed may start to go around in circles, fall into miscommunication, or not happen at all. Over time, this can leave both people feeling unseen, unheard, or stuck in ways they don’t know how to shift.
I work with couples who want to understand what is happening between them, not simply to manage symptoms, but to explore the deeper dynamics shaping their connection.
Rather than taking sides or assigning blame, I create a space where you can begin to understand what is happening between you, the moments of rupture, and the places where connection is possible but difficult to sustain.
Couples therapy offers a place to slow things down and bring awareness to:
Recurring patterns of conflict or withdrawal
Difficulties with communication or emotional safety
Experiences of betrayal, loss, or transition
Differences in sexual desire, intimacy, attachment, or ways of coping
Moments where intimacy feels blocked or fragile
While the past is important, the work focuses on how it is living now in the relationship, in reactions, assumptions, and unspoken expectations.
In sessions, I work actively and collaboratively. At times I may reflect what I’m noticing in the room, ask questions that invite deeper awareness, or gently interrupt familiar patterns so something new can be explored.
Sometimes, we find ourselves responding in ways that feel familiar but difficult to understand. A part of us may feel hurt, rejected, afraid, or compelled to protect itself, even when we know that something from the past is being stirred by what is happening now. Bringing awareness to these different parts of ourselves can help us understand our reactions with greater compassion, and create more choice in how we respond.
My role is not to tell you how to be, but to support you in discovering how your relationship functions, and how it might move toward greater clarity, honesty, and connection.
Couples therapy is not about becoming a “better” couple by external standards. It is about creating the conditions where two people can meet one another more fully, as they are, and where the relationship can become a place of shared understanding rather than struggle.
The Relational Field
I understand the relationship itself as more than two individuals side by side. When two people come together, a relational field is created, a living space between them that carries its own patterns, meanings, and emotional currents. This shared field can be felt in moments of connection, tension, distance, or repair, and often reveals what is difficult to see when focusing on each person alone.
In this sense, relationship can become a space for growth. What is unconscious, defended, or split off in each partner is often brought into awareness through the dynamics of the relationship itself. When this shared space is met with care, presence, and honesty, understanding can deepen, old patterns loosen, and something more truthful and alive has the possibility to emerge.
What matters is a willingness to stay present with what is arising and to approach one another with curiosity rather than certainty.
Practical details
I offer a small number of concessional spaces for those on low income or in receipt of benefits.
Couples therapy can be short term or longer term, depending on what you are bringing and how the work unfolds.
If you’d like to have a brief telephone conversation before deciding whether to begin, you’re welcome to mention this when you get in touch.
